Its been over a week since I last posted and other than some reductions in the swelling in Claire’s legs there is really no change in Claire’s physical health. She is however so much happier to be in the living room as opposed to the bedroom up the stairs. We are still no further forward in getting a “Hospital Bed”. This would make life so much easier as the bed she is using is very low. So need to get one Not sure how to yet. The doctor has not been in touch either considering they referred Claire to the hospital I would have thought they might have wondered is she still had the symptoms which by the way she has.
I am enjoying Claire being down stairs its just a case of working out a routine sometimes takes us a while when there is a change. We are getting there though. Its great spending so much time with Claire as not only is she my wife she is my best friend and I didn’t realise how much I had missed just being able to sit and watch TV with her. Being able to do this again has helped us both so much.
I am sometimes surprised at why people think I blog.
Recently I was told by a MSP “I have great Sympathy for what you do” This made me wonder if people thought that is why I blog to look for sympathy. Well to clear that up NO I DON’T.” I have never looked for Sympathy for what I do that’s not the type of person I am so anyone who thinks that has not been reading my blogs properly.
The whole point of this Blog is to speak up for carers and not seek sympathy for them but more Respect and Understanding. Some people don’t get it and when its an elected representative and a Member of the Scottish Government that in my humble opinion makes it worse. I am not going to Name the MSP as this is not about.
I am not seeking to stand as a candidate for Council, Holyrood or Westminster and have no plans to do so in the for see able future. I have my own political opinion and it is my own. I know that life is not Black and White Neither is it Red verses Blue there are other shades of politics and Football available. However we must also work together and so over the past few years I have spoke to people from all political parties to further the Understanding of Carers in Scotland.
So if you haven’t read this Blog before please read some and hopefully you will have a better understanding of carers and indeed the people they care for.
We are told that the CEO s of the Big Banks get paid the big money as they have to make the big decisions. We we know from experience that they didn’t always get them right.
This isn’t a rant about the bankers it’s about the tough decisions we as carers make every day. The stress of looking after someone 24/7 figures show that Carers are twice as likely to suffer from Depression. I myself suffer from Clinical Depression I have to take Anti Depressants and still have days when I am very down. I find these days are more likely to happen when I feel I am getting nowhere particularly in relation to Claire s health and battling the powers that be to get help, where is am labelled a bully for speaking up for my wife or indeed on days where I know that Claire’s pain is bad and I feel powerless to help. This is when I must fight the most I must not turn to the “Dark Side” but it is hard the Anti Depressants help with the chemical in balance but the mood trigger can still be there which is like being kicked in the teeth emotionally.
Now I know I am not the only carer going through this but these are the times you need friends and help from Carers organisations the most. You have to know when you need help there is no stigma to Depression and Stress. I try to do what I can for the See Me charity which campaigns against the stigma of Mental Health. It only amounts to getting posters and leaflets for the Schools and GP Surgeries but if that points at least one person in the right direction of help then I have done something. Remember there are people to help.
There is a short story called the Loneliness of the Long Distance Runner. Perhaps there should be a story about the Loneliness of the Unpaid Carer.
If you are not careful being a carer can isolate you from the outside world. I care for my wife Claire who due to chronic debilitating pain is stuck in her bed we live in a 2 story house and don’t have a stair-lift She is in the bedroom all the time unless there is a need for her to come down the stairs for an appointment. So when she manages to sleep which can be during the day
You have to cancel things at the last-minute so friends tend to stop inviting you. However I have found a way to keep sane and active and have what I hope is a positive effect on both my own local community and the wider community of my fellow carers and indeed the public in general.
I didn’t set out to do what I did it just sort of happened. I joined Facebook and got involved in Carers Campaigns. and the rest is History as they say.
Having to fight for yourself and the person you care for on a daily basis is great help when you campaign on a local and a National Level. Being able to fight for other people give me an outlet to fight and gain the successes at a higher level when you don’t always get them for yourself.
If I can help one person cope with being a carer or seek help when they need it and felt it would be a weakness then that is what I want to achieve.
I want to raise awareness not only of carers as a whole but of the people they care for.